Day 13 - Yet another breakthrough!

Jog - done.

WWTT: Today one of the big things happened. I shared what's happening in my life with my mother, which I never did. I spoke to her with genuine interest in her.

For many years I tried avoiding her proximity. I wanted her to be happy where ever she was but not with me. I wanted to be left alone. It was not okay for me to be emotionally close to her. My mother was a bubbly person full of life - throughout her life. Of late I am seeing that she is just living. Though she has every material things with her and a loving family who also respects her, I felt that she was not the same old person who was full of josh.

Since I too had hit the rock bottom as far as spirit was concerned and only in last two weeks back I sprang back to Life I thought that me sharing all this with my mother might inspire her to take up something she can do regulary - like my jog. Also I felt like sharing what's happening in my life. Being Experimental made me take this step which was not possible earlier.

I started sharing how 2008 was for me and how my friend's suggestion of taking up one small thing (jog) and doing it regularly gave me an access to spring back to Life. Then we just started talking all over the things and I slowly started getting into her world. And after some time, from my usual advice mode when I switched to listening mode, I was surprised to listen - without her telling - what was important to her. I got present to her world completely.

Earlier in my view she was someone who complained a lot. I never accepted nor approved what she complained about. This made me repel from her even more. But when I got her world I realized how compelled she was to do whatever she was doing. I pointed that to her and saw a smile on her face.

Now, even if she speaks of things that I don't accept or approve, at least I can listen to her, which earlier was too much of a burden for me. So, now I don't have to avoid her. I can be with her. I accept her the way she is. I am more peaceful now.